I came across a few videos on youtube recently, as well as a new site called Real Wiccan Info that really got me thinking about things I wish I knew when I first started practicing. So I compiled a list!
I wish I knew back then that...
- Wicca is not an ancient religion that predates Christianity. I was very influential in the beginning, and came across several books claiming this, only to feel quite shocked and scandalized when I realized that there was no proof! I really wish I knew from the beginning that Wicca is a modern religion that is based on some practices that come from ancient/older traditions/religions/mystery schools, etc.
- Witchcraft is not a requirement of Wicca. I was quite under the impression that to be Wiccan, you had to practice some form of magic. The books never stated as much, but that's what I got from it. To be honest, the magical aspect was one of the things that intrigued me about Wicca, but I really wish it had been stated quite clearly in the beginners books that I read and on the sites that I referenced online that practicing witchcraft does not mean you're a Wiccan, and vice versa.
- Tools are unnecessary. All the information I had at my fingertips had huge, detailed sections about tools - I thought I needed them to practice, and had I had enough money, I probably would have blown it on one of those overpriced altar kits for myself. As it is, I have come to experience that you don't need tools - and there have been many times when I've practiced with nothing more than a single candle, and sometimes with just myself outside. Tools offer a focus, which is nice, but definitely not a requirement. Also, I realized that I didn't need to spend tons of money on tools - while those reserved strictly for ritual use are always a nice addition, using everyday items on hand works just as well.
- Spells are not the answer to everything. I didn't have too much trouble with this, but it seemed that all my reference material had a spell for every little thing, which implied (or so I thought) that in order to be successful, I had to do a spell for every little mundane thing to ensure that things went the way I wanted. This is, of course, absolutely ridiculous. My approach nowadays are to use spells for an extra boost for major nerve-wracking situations, and to help me change a situation that all feasible mundane options have failed to bring about.
- "Wiccan" or "pagan" is not affiliated with a dress style. I didn't follow this trend, but those I came across with an interest in Wicca or paganism all seemed to dress similarly: goth, alt-rock, emo, heavy eyeliners, huge ankh or pentacle chains, and they all seemed to glare a lot. It made me feel as though I wasn't doing something right, that to truly be Wiccan/pagan, I had to dress this way. It made me feel unnecessarily isolated at a time in my life where I already felt isolated to begin with.
- There is a difference between Traditional Wicca and Neo-Wicca. I was under the impression in the beginning that there was no real difference between the two, and it wasn't until much later that I realized - and can now identify - the vast differences between them. Now I know that not to be true.
- Never incorporate an act into your practice unless/until you know it's purpose and agree with it. This was a huge lesson I learned the hard way. I did everything the books told me, because I thought that I was supposed to. It never really occurred to me to question why in the beginning - not until I began noticing opposing acts and vastly different styles of doing the same thing. Now, I don't include anything unless I know where it came from, why it's used, and even then only if the action resonates with me.
- There is no rush to find a matron/patron deity. I have put so much pressure on myself in the past to find my matron and patron, that it created a sort of... block... within me. That block prevented me from really establishing any sort of relationship with a specific deity at all, though I did start a very basic relationship with a general macro view of the Goddess. Now, I'm just taking my time, looking through pantheons, learning about the culture, and only when I feel absolutely ready do I approach a deity.
- Your personal space represents your state of mind. This was something I learned from experimenting with what I learned from a feng shui book, but it's something that absolutely rings true for me. Opening sacred space, meditating, spellwork, celebrating the sabbats, all of that - and just my general state of being - is highly affected by what is around me. If it's dusty, dirty, and cluttered, then I find my personal work suffers, and my mood is more unstable or otherwise not as great as it could be. I don't really like the act of cleaning so much but I do try to keep on top of general room and house upkeep. Not only does it lift my spirits to be in a nice, neat, and clean room, but it's a source of personal pride.
- What's right for someone else is not necessarily right for you. I think every newbie goes through this discovery. We all read books that say their way is the right way, that such-and-such must be done in a specific order - but what I didn't realize as a beginner on this path was that there are numerous methods of getting things done. I don't have to follow the advice of the first person I come across, and it takes trial and error to figure out what works best for me and what doesn't. Two practitioners can try out the same spell with the same tools and ingredients, at the same time, and come up with two completely different outcomes. The same goes toward meditation methods, casting circles, charging items, purification of self, cleansing tools, consecration, etc.
- Journaling is extremely important. Oh, how I wish I was a more avid journalist in the beginning! Right now, I have a little book that I found on clearance at Michael's several years ago, and I write descriptions of tarot readings I've done, thoughts on my path, descriptions of meditations, journeying, spellwork, sabbat celebrations, rituals in general, and anything else that happens to be spiritual related. This book is something I've written in on and off for several years; being able to see how far I've come is amazing to me, and it's inspirational. How I wish I had a journal from the very beginning...
- Have a journal for at least a year before starting a Book of Shadows. I don't think I would have listened to this advice, but I wish I knew how frustrating it would be, starting a BoS without having a journal to reference. I started mine with very little written out before hand, and what I did have, was on looseleaf paper, spread about all my stuff. It's been a year since I started compiling an official BoS, and I have found that I should have started off with a journal form first - the sort where I include information I've looked up, along with personal thoughts, and never adding anything before vast research has been made and personal experience to add. I find that now I have to go back and frequently edit what I already have down, or scrap entire pages completely, and it's rather exhausting. Also, I believe a small journal-size book would be beneficial for circle work, since my binder is heavy, massive, and there's no place to really put it for reference that doesn't create problems.
- There is no rush. The biggest thing for me, is that I always compared my own spiritual growth with others, and always expected to grow faster. Maybe it's because of that competitive part of me, or maybe I felt I needed to prove to myself - and others - that I belonged on this path, and therefore, would excel quickly. Either way, I rushed through a lot of things that I had to later pause and revisit. I wish I knew then that everyone moves at their own pace, and there was nothing wrong with sticking with one lesson longer than others, or whatever the situation might have been.
Though I wish I knew these things from the beginning - it certainly would have made things a lot less confusing - I can't help but appreciate the trials and learning experience. I doubt I would have had the same lessons learned had I known all of these things - whether that's good or bad, I can't say, but I can state that I value the learning experience regardless.
What are some things that you wish you knew when you first started your path?
